Season Two opener: Owning Emotions and Making Conscious Choices

intro: 0:05

Welcome to. This Is Source, the podcast that invites you to explore the depths of your being and tap into your true potential. This show is all about inspiring you to discover the power within yourself to create a life of purpose, joy and fulfillment. So sit back, relax and let's dive deep into the essence of who you are.

Agris: 0:34

Season two, season two how do you feel about that?

Mark: 0:37

It's pretty crazy. I mean, it just went by too quick, right.

Agris: 0:42

It did. You know, I think we learned a lot from season one and I think this, this all experiment, or this podcast, is about conversation, listening, learning, reflecting on things. What is, for you, most takeaway from season one?

Mark: 1:02

You know, I think it's just what you said. That word experiment kind of jumps right out to me, because the other day I just had a conversation about what does it mean to be held accountable for something? Right and so, and how do you hold yourself accountable for things? And I used our podcast as an example when I was talking about this, because our podcast was born out of this idea that two people with a shared passion could come together and have conversations about something they just like to talk about. Right, and when we?

Mark: 1:38

You know, when we started, the reason why we did it was because we said, like, let's just experiment.

Mark: 1:43

You know, that was the first time in my life where I didn't buy the fancy equipment, I didn't hire the voice coach or the podcast coach and all that stuff and make sure that I was as polished and perfect as possible.

Mark: 1:56

Look, let's just get out there and let's just fumble around a bit and make the best of it. You know, and then all of a sudden I don't know how long that was, I guess it was like what three months that we did Almost 30-something podcast episodes, and in the midst of both running our own businesses and families and traveling and all this other stuff, and it ended up being the most important and exciting part of our work in general, and so it was sustainable because it was an experiment and we were willing to acclimate to whatever came up in our schedules and how we you know we use a couple of different systems right, and it's been really fun. It's been a successful experiment in the fact that here we are, season two, 30-something episodes in and even more clear today than we were when we started, but yet we haven't lost that original vision and that reason why we started it in the first place. So how do you feel about this?

Agris: 2:58

Very similar to you, you know, like I think we cannot run out of the source, you know, and I think that's the most remarkable thing, but I understood that there are so many people with passions, different perspectives, you know, and to engage in conversations, and I think that's conversations will be the theme for the second season really. At least this is how we envision, but we know that not always everything goes as a perfect plan.

Agris: 3:32

I think yes really what really enjoyed from the first season was that, our passion really just to sit open up. Because, honestly, I think you know, like for me that felt like a transparency freedom, because you just have to be there, right, you have to be open, you have to be honest, you have to come from your own authentic yourself. And actually I recognize that when we started, I think it was something like April, march, something right. Now it's end of the August and the first, the second season will first episode will be out on 11th of September and like wow, even I changed so much you know the way how I'm thinking that actually listening to many other perspectives, how those other perspectives really reflect within me and create a new sort of truth for myself.

Agris: 4:35

So I think that's the beauty, you know that, the beauty of us always being able to be in that evolution that we accepting ourselves every day again and again and again, and maybe something which we don't feel we let go about ourselves too. You know, we just see what is like. For me, this is like vitality, you know, you just feel what is really important and vital within, and and there are sorts of dead parts too which like okay, you know, this is not something I want to bring, keep doing. So I just let say thank you to those parts or histories or whatever what occurred, and just let it go, you know, and and arrive to the new concepts, new synthesis, and yeah, man, it's been great, you know, and I'm really looking forward to the second season because I feel we learned that we at least can speak for myself.

Agris: 5:39

You know, I think I really want to contribute myself more from from what I learned and from my understanding about life, and I want to engage myself even more, just, yeah, just just to give my perspective, because I think it's important that people really put their perspective in and listen to others perspective, so because from different point of views, we can arrive to some sort of interesting conclusions. You know what about you, mark?

Mark: 6:13

Yeah, I mean I would. I would definitely agree with that. I think two things that pop up for me was, I guess. Well, I have a couple questions for you. The first question I have is what has changed for you in these past six months?

Agris: 6:28

Oh, man, you know, it's like my. I'm not talking about my world from outside, you know, because that there are things changing too, you know. But I'm speaking more about my inside, you know, because, honestly, you know, like I really arrived to the point that I created my own synthesis. I call it system.

Agris: 6:51

You know how I really see this life and I'm very passionate about that, you know, and I am keep developing it and actually changed a lot because, you know, I've been studying in the past many different ways of looking at that life, you know, and when it felt like during this last five, six months, something came together and created some, something like my own approach to the third and that's and I know what I have to add, because I'm adding, actually it's.

Agris: 7:27

I'm very excited about that because I'm going to be certificate certificate regression hypnotherapist soon, you know, and and actually life coach certification as well. So I'm still adding things to my, my synthesis, you know, because I feel I'm still like I like to learn new things I like to do, to challenge myself and see, like, okay, which patterns in me is something I want to keep and which patterns I want to challenge and expand, you know. So it's never ending story. So I don't know, man, it changed a lot, but I for sure can say that I see the world and life around me much more beautiful than I did before, and thanks to this is source podcast as well, for sure.

Mark: 8:21

So so I think what I hear you saying is that and I don't know if it was a direct well, you said it was a direct result to this is source podcast, but just I don't know if it was just coming together with other like-minded people or just just going within and trying to sort out who you really are and how you're here to serve the planet, you know and like what's important to you and what skill set do you have and what interests do you have and what passions do you have, and putting it into something like some kind of a framework or a system or synthesis, like you called it, so that you can have something to work with. Like that, you have something to offer people, right, and I mean I think that's an amazing thing. You just said so many things that jumped out at me. It was like growth, right being. You know if we're not growing then we're dying.

Mark: 9:10

Right, and I think a lot of times, like we get, we become so scared of life and the world and everything that's going around us that we take the more comfortable, reliable, you know safe container to be in. But if you look at a plant, like you know, it only grows to the size of the pot. You know a lot of plants or a fish that only grows to the size of the aquarium. You know you have to be willing to expand yourself, like you were saying, right, you have to expand yourself in order to grow, like you have to expand the container. And I think probably that's what this is source was. We created it. We created a container right For you and I to come together. It started off with just me and you having conversations and then we were like, let's bring in other people and have them contribute to their conversations. So now we expanded the size of the container and we grow as a direct result of that, and then the people that listen grow because it expands their mind, expands their consciousness, and so then they expand their container and it gives them more opportunity to grow.

Mark: 10:15

So you know, I guess it's a perfect segue into my next question, because I was curious, like if you were getting feedback from any people, from anybody that was listening to the show. Because I know that I was and I was asking people what are you appreciating about the show? Because it's always nice to hear when people reach out and they're saying I actually really enjoy your show. I listen to it on the way to work every morning, I listen to it on my lunch break or I listen to it at the gym, and my question is always like why?

Mark: 10:44

Why do you like it? Is it something that we're saying? And I think what I'm getting the theme is as an answer is that they're looking at things differently, that they're hearing ideas that they never heard before, that they're like oh, I didn't even know that was a thing, or I'd never heard it like that before. I don't usually think that deep about that kind of stuff, so it gave them an opportunity or permission to kind of go there, and so I appreciated that, and I guess my question to you is were you getting any feedback as well?

Agris: 11:19

Yeah, man, I did, and that's what is exactly what people says. They're saying that it's just interesting to see things from different sorts of perspectives.

Agris: 11:32

You know, that, oh, you know, you made me think about something, or you made me wonder about something, or you or you just spoke about something which I would never think you know again. You know, it's just, and I think that those things happens for reason for people, you know, and people get like brought to this podcast as a guest or listeners, you know, they they supposed to be sharing what they supposed to share, or they supposed to hear what they're supposed to hear. You know, and, and something stays within you know, and, and I think this is actually about growth, you know, you just you cannot read all air, right, it's just because air is, it's a lot of air, but you breathe in certain amount of air and you have new oxygen for you know, and, and that's about perspectives, you cannot breathe all perspectives in, you know, but you just get certain perspective at certain time and something sticks within and something, something just goes back into universe, right?

Mark: 12:45

So I think that's.

Agris: 12:45

That's what it is, you know, and it just it's a beautiful exchange of energy.

Agris: 12:53

That's what I really love to do exchange of energy and and and really have reflections on something which really makes me more wonder and be curious about and see what really keeps going for me in front of me. You know, and you know that's about awareness, you know, to just to see what's what's in front of us. You know, and and yeah, so you are asking questions, but I will go back with question, you know, because I know, like in in second season, we really want to make it more about really involve, or I wouldn't say expertise, but something about we are really passionate about. And I know you are very passionate about how you're looking at the life, the people, and I know that you want in the second season, really to put that more to attention for listeners and our guests. So maybe you can tell what is something where you want to come from more, at least at the beginning of the season. Maybe it will shift during the season and you'll find new passions to add on. But what is where you stand right now?

Mark: 14:07

Yeah, I like that you say that, because I think that's that idea that you just touched on is the reason why. So what I mean is that the fact that we say that this is how I am right now, this is my belief system currently, and I don't know what six weeks from now where it's going to be like, gives me the freedom to just explore what that is in the moment. And also, once we find a belief system or a paradigm or a system or framework or whatever that works for us, we are always growing and evolving. So we have to grow and evolve with that and, like you said before, if it doesn't work like, it might work right now, work three weeks or six months from now, and we need to be okay with. Okay, well, that served me for that time and now this is how I feel.

Mark: 14:56

And so, yes, I've been a coach for almost 11 years now, and let's talk about why did I become a coach in the first place? And it's because I had suffered as a result of what happened from 9-11. So, going through that tragedy or trauma, whatever word you want to put on it, there was damage that was caused as a result of that, so I suffered from anxiety and depression and a bunch of other things, and I had to figure that out. I had to work through that. I had to heal that in me right so that I could move on with my life, because I wasn't in a good place for a little while as a result of that. And so what I discovered along that path was that I discovered a way that worked for me, and that's what my book was about. Right, my book was about. This was my personal journey. These are the things that I experienced might not work for you, but this is what worked for me, and I want to share my story with you because some of what worked for me might work for you.

Mark: 15:55

And so when I started going around and speaking like the speaking tour when the book launched I had people that were approaching me and they wanted to work with me, and I was like I don't even know what that looks like. I'm a professional chef. I own a catering company in New York City. I'm not a coach. I'm not a counselor. I had a background in psychology from college, but I didn't think I was in a place to do that. But if people are asking and you have it within your heart to serve people and you see that other people are suffering and you might be able to offer a way to help them. It's hard to ignore that right. And so that's when I signed up to work with Tony Robbins, because I figured, try to find the best in the business, the most well known, the person who's making the biggest impact and changing like literally hundreds of thousands, if not millions, of lives. So I picked him to go through his training program and you know, and it was great, I loved it, you know, but there was a lot of growth and learning that I had to go through as a coach, as I was going through all that, and but the one thing that I will say is that in all those 11 years, even though I had a lot of success with my clients it was their success, but you know them and I working together as a team, you know it was working for a lot of people.

Mark: 17:09

Really was this last year of my life that has completely transformed? Because what I've come to understand is that all of what we don't like about ourselves, all of what's not working in our life, can all be tied back to some part of our childhood, right? Because from us taking our first breath, you know, to about eight or nine years old. All of our programming takes place during that time. So it's all all our model of the world, our belief system, our punishment and rewards. It's all from our parents, and then, if we're involved with any kind of a religion, it's the church, and then the next step is society, right, and so they hand us, like, this package, this rule book. This is how you navigate life. They become our belief systems, and then that's how we operate our life.

Mark: 17:57

But then we wake up in our thirties and our forties and our fifties and we're like, I feel like a fraud.

Mark: 18:02

I don't like myself. I don't had all these dreams and aspirations and I wouldn't know the first thing about doing it. I've created this comfortable cocoon and I want to expand beyond that, but I'm terrified. You know, or you know, and the list goes on and on, and what I've discovered through my own process is that this all ties back to all of that. You know that it's all part of our programming and that there are ways for us to access those beliefs, access those parts of us that are not okay with the things that happened to us in the past, and we can heal those parts of us and we can integrate them back into our life, and it really does change who you are and how you experience life and, most importantly, it changes how you relate to all the people around you.

Mark: 18:47

And so, yeah, it's a great question and the simple answer is I want to focus on that. I want because I know that it works and it's repeatable and it's reliable, and everybody that I have this conversation about is like wow, I never really considered that the reason I snap at my kids, or the reason why I'm terrible with money, or the reason why I've been stuck in the same position for the same 20 years, is because I don't believe in myself, or I don't love myself, or you know, and, or I have fears, and that that all ties to, like my experiences as a child, you know, and, and when we can become aware of that and we can learn strategies for dealing with that, everything begins to change. We really undergo a total transformation in our lives, and so that, right now, is what I'm most passionate about and I look forward to, you know, integrating that into our future conversations.

Agris: 19:44

Amazing man. Do you see, like, for example, you just talk with, let's say, strangers, or you see people on the street acting certain way, or you see in in politics or whatever society layers, you know you can see things happening. Do you see how it relates to that childhood, Like why?

Mark: 20:09

this happens 100%. Yeah, I have a friend that she's an NP and she a nurse practitioner and she works in the cardiac cath lab, right, and she's been in the cardiac cath lab her whole life. So she deals with heart disease, right People having heart attacks and strokes and things like that. And she used to tell me that she could sit in a restaurant and she could look around the room and she could tell you who has heart disease just by looking at them, because she's an expert in that field and there are telltale signs, right, like that she's aware of, so she'll know right away if somebody has heart disease or not. And my wife is also in the cardiac cath lab and she's she could say the same thing. She's been doing it for a long time as well.

Mark: 20:52

And that's how I feel about what I'm talking about when I see where people are getting stuck, where people are overcompensating and their you know, their egos have taken over to the point where they are, you know, you know, like again overcompensating, just like just leading from that insecure, scared place but trying to pretend like they're actually way stronger and way more put together and you know, and just being and constricting all the time, as opposed to being open and willing and like, comfortable enough to just allow things to be the way they are, but instead from operating from that fear based, constricted place trying to control every aspect of their life, you know, which is absolutely impossible and totally exhausting. But most people are suffering from that and, yeah, absolutely, I see it all the time and that's why it gives me so much hope and that's why I want to talk about it, because I see that when people are able to connect with us between, oh, this is the way that I behave and this is where it all started and I could do something differently, I mean, like, wouldn't you want everybody to have that gift, you know, like just to have more awareness that's going to help them suffer a little bit less, right, like? I heard recently somebody say that that the ego is just a group of orphans, right? Or a group of, like inner children, right, that we've, you know, sort of isolated from ourselves, or like and. And so I was like, oh, it's so, ego is an exaggerated group of orphans, and so I thought about this as like oh, so our ego is just basically a bunch of little children that are trying to keep us safe, right and out. Like so, when you think about it from that perspective, it's like Wow, like there could be so much compassion and there could be so much gratitude towards that ego, like wow, thank you so much for trying to keep me safe for my whole life. Thank you so much for trying to. You know, like, for helping me navigate this world of uncertainty, and like what appears to be a scary place most of the time. And then you can go like, but you know what, I got it from here. Like you know we could work together and I could use some of your strengths, but I got it from here.

Mark: 23:09

But you see that all the time. Like, you see that when we have these inner children that we don't Acknowledge and we don't respond to, we don't connect to, they end up taking over in Situations where we're like super vulnerable, you know, and or we're overwhelmed or insecure, and they behave like giant children. And you see it all the time, right, you literally see it all the time. It's like a child in an adult body and you see the way they react to life. And then you see the way people react to that person, right, I think the last political, you know election and probably the next few, two or maybe the next, however many, until eternity. But you see how people are triggered so easily, right?

Mark: 23:52

And I think in the past I used to go what's wrong with people? Why can't they just let it go? Now I realized, like, of course, people would respond to that, because when someone behaves a certain way, it triggers a part of them. That's not okay, right, and rather than take ownership over that and sit in that uncomfortable space for a little bit to try to get the message we need to hear as a result of that, we just point the finger at that other person and be like, oh, he's the problem and if he behaved differently Then the world would be okay. But the truth is, thank God he's behaving like that because, as a result, I'm triggered by that behavior and now it's an opportunity for me to do something about it, you know.

Mark: 24:30

And then we become more and more who we really are as we integrate these parts of ourself, and then we let everyone around us off the hook. We're like you could say, and do whatever you want to do. Everyone has the freedom to show up the way they want to do it. He didn't get there by accident. She didn't get there by accident. She wanted to be there. He wanted to be there. He earned the right to say what he wants to say. She earned the right to say what she wants to, and you have the right to be upset by it. But just realize that it's not an unfair world, right? It's just you're getting upset because it reminds you of a time where you didn't have the power to stand up for yourself. So sit in that for a little bit, explore that, ask the questions, integrate that into your life and you realize that you know what.

Mark: 25:11

Yeah, I remember there was a time where I wanted to be able to speak my mind and I didn't have the power or the ability to do that. But now I'm 40, 50, 60 years old. I can do that. But guess what? And this leads us to the next part, which is like what got us started on the podcast? I don't know how to. I don't know how to speak my voice.

Mark: 25:30

What if I sound like an idiot? What if nobody listens to me? What if everyone's like why does he have a podcast? He came to put two sentences together. He never makes a point like what gives him the right? And the reality is it's like Well, because I was willing to say to myself and to you, right, as a co-host, let's just go out there and be willing to go out on a limb and sound like a bunch of idiots that don't know what we're talking about and Fumble around and look unprofessional and look like we don't have it together, because that's what we want to do. No one starts off as an expert in anything, right we. You have to start somewhere. You have to be willing to at least try, and so my long way of saying that that's what I feel most Passionate about right now.

Agris: 26:12

So, in a sense, you are Healing some parts of yourself to right during the this process, during the last year and and many, many years before, because, like, if you want to open up a little bit what your Orfronts, you saved lately in your yeah, I mean your childhood. Your from your inner child.

Mark: 26:36

Well, I never realized that I was a perfectionist. I never realized that my goal was always to try to be as polished and perfect as I can be, which is, of course, ridiculous. But what I realized was that that was a defense mechanism. There was a coping mechanism that it. The harder I work trying to prove to the world that I'm good enough, that I'm capable enough, that I deserve to be in this position of authority or a leadership, like in a leadership position Then the less likely I'll be attacked by people, the less likely people will make me feel insecure and vulnerable, the less likely I'll have to defend myself in the process. But if that's your MO, right, if that's what you're leading with, you won't do most things. You'll have all these ideas of like I want to be a public speaker, I want to be an author, I want to write a book, I want to, you know, travel around and spread my message. You'll never do any of those things because you'll always come up with another excuse that you're not ready to be that person. Yet. I need another coach, I need another mentor, I need, like, more training. Like a vocalist, I need to lose 10 pounds, I need to put on 15 pounds of muscle and my teeth need to be whiter, I need to dress nicer. You know like there's all these things that we come up with that we want to put in the way of Doing what we came here to do, like what our soul really knows that we came here to do. And so your question was what orphans did I rescue? It was the, that little child inside of me that was like you're not good enough, you're not worthy to be in any position and Fly under the radar. Right Like these are things that I learned from childhood. Don't make a spectacle out of yourself. We're barely getting by as it is. We don't need any extra trouble. We don't need you to run your mouth. No one cares what you need to, what you have to say. Just follow the program. Life as hard enough as it is. We didn't don't make it any more difficult than it already is, and that's something that I carried for most of my life.

Mark: 28:37

And then I'm in my 30s and I'm getting this calling that I need to step up and share what I love, what I've learned, what I'm passionate about, my perspective, my experiences with others. But what's getting in the way of that is that wounded child inside of me that's like it's not time yet, you're not ready, don't put yourself out there, don't make things more difficult, don't be attacked, you're safe. Why do you need to do that? Why do you have to make things more difficult? Like why can't you just be satisfied with like helping 10 people? Why do you always have to like up level?

Mark: 29:08

You know it doesn't make it, but I realize that that's a child inside of me that's trying to keep me safe, right, and it's like oh, I appreciate that, thank you, right, but I know better. I know that I have a message and a mission and that that's what's leading me now, and I'm vulnerable enough and willing to be vulnerable Enough to put myself out there. Even what I do look like an idiot and I don't make sense and I lose track of what I'm saying and I gain 10 pounds and I'm exhausted and I look like crap, whatever, right, like there's a million things that we could say, but my mission and my passion and what I came here to do is more Important than all the things. I think I need to finally show up in life and be who I came here to be.

Agris: 29:51

Yeah, I mean all this message gives me. What you just said, associates, for me was like you cannot learn to play the game without really playing the game. You know like you have to go and play the game. You know you cannot sit on the bench and all the time make critique for everyone that they do wrong. You know you just have to step into the playing playing field and start to play the game. You know, and and yeah mistakes.

Agris: 30:23

Does it mean mistake? There's? There are no mistakes. It's just a learning process, right? It's just the process of the growth. So, and I think that's that's, I think that's what you understood, that, oh, it's like no, I'm worthy, I'm good enough, I'm, I can go and play. You know, probably I don't have enough skills yet, I just want to play you know, let me play, let me play. And I, in this moment of evolve, evolution on the earth.

Agris: 30:53

Everyone can find a way how to step and play the game you know, and I think that's the beauty of these days, you know, everyone can somehow find the voice and give their voice, add their voice to consciousness, to, to whole, you know. So it's just a fun, fun part, you know, and I love that you, you, how to say? You get to talk to those stuck fragments from your childhood and you understood where's the, where are those? You know places, which holds you back and you know, and I'm happy, you know, like, welcome to the to the game, mark. You know, right, right, you know, it was the same for me. You know, like I'm just looking from what you are talking, I'm looking from different perspective, how I'm getting there. You know, because I, if I, if I see, like how I want to come from, from which place, is really that I, really I am passionate about how the energy moves. You know and I am passionate how the energy moves into this physical life and at certain time and moment, you know and and you can actually see by many methods, you know what exactly you're going to learn in this life, lifetime, you know, and how it's going to play out and what are going to be those events and circumstances, most probably, which will give you this learning process. So I think that's for me, this is very interesting way. This is where I developed my system. You know, that synthesis of many other teachings which I'm willing to show to the humanity.

Agris: 32:44

You know, and show a look at this. You know, actually, everything is okay, everything is actually perfect. You're supposed to come in this family, you're supposed to get this inner traumas, childhood traumas. You're supposed to fail, you're supposed to go through crisis. You know that's actually what you choose to do. You know so it's just become owner of your life path and start to enjoy it, because if you will not, then you will just keep going same miserable, probably way, or being the critic, critic, critic, criticizing everyone for whatever they are doing and not stepping in yourself. So, yeah, this is how I looking at things, you know, and, let's be honest, it's the same, it we are becoming, from two different perspective, from two different passions, right same thing. And I think that's the beauty and I think that's what we really want more in the second season to bring in people from different perspectives right, and see how we can put this all together and look at the things from different point of views right like oh okay, this is interesting, you know.

Agris: 34:05

Oh, it's interesting that you arrived to this from there, and you arrived actually probably to the same point where we stand right now, and it's right, and I think it just that's what I looking for. The second season.

Mark: 34:19

Right, and I think, also sharing more of that with people on a one on one, like having people come on the show, call in on the show, you know, and we can share these things and they can apply it right on the spot.

Mark: 34:32

You know, like we could have. You know, for those that have been listening for the whole first season, that maybe want to take what we're talking about and literally integrated or apply it to their life, that we're willing to work with people and do that and give them a taste of what that looks like and what strategies they can implement in their life. And you know what I mean. Like it's not just to take it from, like, the conceptualized state to the application state of like what does that actually look? Like? Like, how can? It sounds great what you guys are saying and it gives me lots of hope and it's exciting. But how do I do that? You know, like this is what my life is like and I want to know how can I apply that directly into my life. You know, so that that's going to be an exciting part of the season too, I think.

Agris: 35:14

Yeah, just I think it's also tell me how this played out in your life. You know, give me some example as well. You know, like, why? Why? Why you think that's the best way out of those situations. You know why, like, give me more. I think we just I think it's not beautiful just to talk about theory, you know, in general, but I think it would be great really to really to go deep into and see why we feel some certain ways. You know, and and yesterday was really interesting and I want want to ask you what you feel about that.

Agris: 35:53

You know, because I saw, basically, you know like, big influencer from spiritual mathematic, yeah, he's, he has like half a million followers person, you know, and he he posted that About how big corporations, putting in terms of use, you know, about really giving all the person like in perpetuity ownership to those big corporation and he was sort of frustrated. You know that that we people letting big corporations take that's like that they own us in a way, right I don't know why. For me first comment which came out like not like first comment, but first thing, what came out to me was like isn't that what souls does to? Or physical body? They just literally, you just sign, like our physical body, sign for the soul to have full sort of ownership.

Agris: 36:56

you know, of your life and and in perpetuity. You know, and for me is like, and you cannot escape this, you know, and either you start to live in coherence and it's the same. You know, like if you think that somebody owns you, it's just you are going to be triggered, frustrated, and those kind of things actually gives us those triggers and I was like, I was like amazed, like oh, why does this doesn't trigger me anymore.

Agris: 37:28

It's like oh, maybe I, just if I feel within myself that even I sign whatever term of use which we most probably don't even read right, we just click it Right the times with the time.

Mark: 37:42

Yeah.

Agris: 37:43

I mean you don't read, it's made like from hundreds of pages.

Mark: 37:47

you know it's like oh, I just want to.

Agris: 37:48

I don't know use whatever social media or whatever video recorder you know and you just sign it Right. It turns out there's lots of perpetuity and lots of things you know right. For me, somehow, it was like no, I don't give up, I don't give myself to anyone.

Agris: 38:07

Even though I can, maybe I click it. I agree, I still don't feel, because if you will start to really get worried about that, you, that somebody owns you, like you can even start to think like, okay, I'm coming into this world in certain country, so that country, actually you belong to that country, they own you, you pay taxes, or you can go, constrict yourself into endless worrying thinking, how miserable it is. You know, like, oh my gosh, you know, there is my freedom, or I think, man, I think freedom starts within us, that we really actually start to own or way of looking at things and or seeing in our perspective and not others perspective. You know, right, I just wanted to say what do you think about this? You know it's interesting. What's your point of view? What does trigger exactly triggers there? Because people are triggered like hugely about this.

Mark: 39:10

Yeah, that's, that's exactly right. It's all about triggers. It's all about, like, if I have felt oppressed my whole life, then I'm going to be triggered by a statement like that, because you know, or the idea of that, because it reminds me of how I felt in the past, and that was another one of the things that I dealt with my whole life. I felt trapped my entire life. I always felt like I was in situations that I did not want to be in and that started from childhood, but it showed up even as an adult, right, and that's a difficult thing to deal with, because then you hate your job and you hate your marriage and you hate this and you hate that, because you always feel trapped. But it's just a state of mind, it's just completely a state of mind, and that's why I think people get so wrapped up in what you're talking about, because they don't realize that it's at a certain point they shift from like like operating from a point of view where they can use their critical thinking skills to deal with something to being completely overwhelmed by their emotions, and it's like they're dealing with a whole different set of orphans that are like we need to just put this fire out. This is a big fire, this is a problem. We're going to get burned by this. And then, like this, you know the first responders show up to put the fire out and they don't care about the collateral damage, they don't care about who else is burned and who else is hurting the process, it's just about keeping you safe right away. That's why it's so easy for anybody, because and I've been down this route before, not saying this from a place of judgment I've been down those rabbit holes, I've done the research, I've gotten sucked into all of it and all it is.

Mark: 40:43

It's a trap where you just get stuck in your own like emotions. You know like you just get overwhelmed by your own emotions and and that's okay, but at least take ownership, responsibility and be honest about that that I'm not really angry at this person that's oppressing me, that I'm just upset because when I was a kid, I felt trapped, I felt oppressed, I felt like not free, right, and so if we're willing to take honesty over it and that point our finger at somebody else and say you're the bad person, I'm the good person, if you weren't doing what you were doing, then I can feel free in my own mind. Well, that's not actually true, and we know that because if you follow people like Victor Frankel, right, who Ellie Rizel, like people that talk about their experiences in the Holocaust, right, where they were truly oppressed, right, but they still lived to tell the stories from the point of view of actually what I realized in being in that true oppressive situation in environment was that I was always free in my mind, like maybe I couldn't go anywhere and I couldn't fight back and I couldn't escape, but I was free in my mind. And so when it was all over, I learned that, oh wow, freedom exists in the mind. It doesn't matter what constrictions you have on you. If you're free in the mind, then you just get to experience the freedom of life, right. And so when we take ownership over why we feel the way we do and we see that it ties to something that we had to experience when we weren't strong enough, smart enough or developed enough back in the day to deal with, then we could do something about it.

Mark: 42:17

And I think you and I have both been through this, because we've had like conversations at nauseam about this how you get so sucked into the documentaries and the rabbit holes, and oh my God, I need to be the one that stands up and stops this. This is horrible, you know. But then you realize, like you know, oh, that's just me being overwhelmed by my own emotions. And those emotions, if I'm willing to just sit in them for a little bit, I'll realize, oh wait, who is it inside of me that's upset right now? Oh, it's a little boy that's three years old, or five years old, or seven years old, that doesn't see the big picture, doesn't yet have an abroad perspective like this huge model of the world, see the very narrow minded view of the world, and does feel trapped and does feel pressed right. And if you can, like, have a conversation with that part of you and sued that part of you and integrate that part of you, then it's a total game changer and you realize that, wow, everybody else is getting upset and sucked into all of that. Now, when I say that, it doesn't mean to say that you shouldn't stand up for yourself in certain situations. Right, you have to have boundaries and stuff.

Mark: 43:24

But I think this is where the awareness key comes in. It's being aware of why I feel the way that I feel and why I'm so easily sucked into these emotional states and why they take over in my life. You know what I'm saying, and and and. Instead of reacting to life all the time, we're responding to life and we can make that choice of you know what? I understand that. That's what's going on and I even can understand that perspective and if I bought into that, I can either understand how I could be on that team or I could be like in that mindset. But I'm just not interested in that. I want to be over here. I want to take what I've learned about myself and how I went from suffering to a sense of freedom and I want to share that with other people so that they can experience that that's all no right or no wrong. It's just having that awareness and being able to make a different choice Does that answer your question?

Agris: 44:14

Oh, definitely you know, because I mean, let's be honest, you know, like, if you will start to think that, oh my gosh, you know, like, like everyone has to breathe the same air, or oh, you know, the earth is just, it owns us because we have to use it and it use us, or whatever. You know it just for me it's kind of the same things, you know, and I think it's just. Yes, we share consciousness together, we are connected all together and even though, if someone wants to claim it that I own it, it's nobody owns anything in my perspective.

Mark: 44:55

We are just using.

Agris: 44:58

We are just amazing users of that, this abundance and this wholeness which we can use, regenerate.

Agris: 45:09

And Earth is a beautiful place where come like many, many things, like a birth, you know, like something new can evolve and it just dies at some point as well, you know, and it just keeps on growing and it just keeps regenerating.

Agris: 45:26

And this is the beautiful place where actually everything works in that beautiful balance and just everything is so perfect that we shouldn't be worried that actually we own anything or somebody owns us, because we, all of us, we are just sharing the same energy and just let's try to enjoy, you know, let's not think how much who owns, because actually even they don't own anything. It's just it's a beautiful energy flow which we can decide how much peace we will use and transform into our lives. You know, or we will sit tight in a small village, a small house, and use just a little bit of that energy which is available, or we can expand as much as we can envision, as much as we have our curiosity, or we can. That's the beauty of this beautiful life, you know. And if we will start to worry about oh my gosh, you know then that's constrict right and you know what happens when things start to constrict you.

Mark: 46:40

You know you just I'm an expert in that. I'm an expert in construction.

Agris: 46:48

We can talk about that some other time too. But I mean, yeah, we think we are going to end this episode and I'm excited, you know. I think I'm so excited to look how you are looking at the things. You know. I really enjoyed your perspective, how you explain how you see these things. You know where it comes from your perspective and I see it from my perspective and it's so beautiful, you know, and oh man.

Mark: 47:19

Well, and likewise, I'm excited for you to have more of a platform to unveil that right, because this you building this new framework that you've been working on for a while, that is working for you and is working for your clients. This is something that now you can you know you can share with more people and we all benefit from that. You know we're all going to take things from that. That's going to challenge us, expand us, give us insight so we can grow and experience bigger and better things. So I'm excited about that too. It's going to be awesome.

Agris: 47:54

I dedicated at least the last 10 years to study life. You know about how perfect it is from numerology and an astrology and many others theories. But what is I want to add is actually that energy beyond where we come in into the life and when we go out of the life. You know right, and add that extra layer to this actual life, so to see whole picture. For me it's very interesting. You know how it flows in, how it goes through and flows out. You know goes back, you know how everything beautifully works in the circle and I want to open up more also that and that's really not seen circle, because we see the life, we see how everything works on earth. But for me also interesting to add that extra layer and hopefully I can share that too, because I'm about to study those things more and more.

Mark: 48:59

And I think that those are extremely valuable and important because I think, you know, at least in my perspective, that's what helped me heal a lot in my life and it takes away a lot of the fear. You know, like the result of contemplating what you're talking about is it takes away the fear of death, it takes away the fear of the unknown, you know, because you realize like everything is in its perfect state all the time that you came here for a reason and even if you screwed up along the way, it's still going to work out, the way that needs to work out, and you're still going to get. You came here to accomplish and you're still going to feed the bigger system. Like you're still adding to consciousness, even if you make what some people would consider the wrong choices or bad choices. Like you're always adding to right and you're oh and so life itself is always benefiting and consciousness itself is always benefiting. And when you think about life from that perspective, it's like it's hard to not feel good about life. It's hard to not like imagine waking up and you're just like I might totally screw up today and that's completely okay, and that it's not like why should you give a shit about life type of an attitude because it all means nothing or you know, it's more of like we don't need to beat ourselves up or beat ourselves into doing things. A certain way, I've been processing what you're talking about all the time lately in my life and realizing that how much of what I do in life is dictated by me wanting to be able to say at the end of life that I did a good job. You know what I mean. Like I want to like leave this experience being able to say, like if somebody's going to say you did good or you did bad, I want them to say you did good, right.

Mark: 50:39

And then I think where did that come from? Like why should that matter? You trace it back, you trace it back to childhood, right, and you realize that actually doesn't matter. And there's no one even stand. There's not going to be someone standing there. You're going to be the one standing there hugging yourself. You know what I mean.

Mark: 50:57

Like somebody had posted recently. They said who are the chosen people? Who are the chosen people? And then I forgot what the other part of it was oh, who are the spiritual ones and who are the chosen ones? And I said my response was everyone is chosen and everybody is spiritual right. You would not believe how upset people got by that Right. Yeah, where does that come from? Where did I come up with that? I came up with that because of what you're talking about. When you see why we came in here and when you see what happens after we leave and you see how what we brought in supports the entire system and that there's value in all of it right and that it's all perfect, it's impossible not to think everybody is chosen and everybody's spiritual right.

Mark: 51:49

But if you're stuck in the paradigm of you have to behave like this, you have to do life a certain way. If you want someone at the end of this game to say you did a good job or you did a bad job, right, then that's what you're going to get. You're going to get someone that's really upset by a comment like that. If I'm allowed to, if I have to live my life by these rules and you're allowed to do whatever you want, and we both end up in the same place. I don't find that fair at all. Well then I shouldn't have to follow these rules and you and I would be like well, who said you had to follow the rules and they would be like but that's just the way that it is, you know, and that's that's why we're having these conversations.

Agris: 52:26

I just this takes me back to that which I started that theme about. I think it's just all about significance, right? It's just like like what wait, I'm not significant? No, you are, but you are the same as everyone else significant. So if you want to make yourself more significant, you will always be triggered by someone who takes your freedom away. You're, you know. So just be humble. Know that everyone is significant. Anyone. Just see life from their own perspective. Everyone just trying to be whatever they want to be and enjoy life. You know, just enjoy this beautiful wholeness and beautiful life. And everything is in the source, you know, and it's just beautiful way of looking at it, at least from my perspective. But I let everyone else think what they want to think. Thank you.

Mark: 53:23

Mark, you know. Conclusion.

Agris: 53:26

Thank you, thank you, looking to be continued as we say Absolutely Yep.

intro: 53:34

Thank you for tuning into. This is source. We hope that this conversation has sparked something within you and that you feel inspired to continue exploring your own journey of self discovery. Remember you are the source of your own transformation and the possibilities for growth and expansion are infinite. If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with your friends and family, and don't forget to subscribe so you never miss an episode. Until next time, keep shining your light and living your truth.